0916hrs..
"You only live twice or so it seems,
One life for yourself and one for your dreams.
You drift through the years and life seems tame,
Till one dream appears and love is its name.
And love is a stranger who'll beckon you on,
Don't think of the danger or the stranger is gone.
This dream is for you, so pay the price.
Make one dream come true, you only live twice."
- Nancy sinatra
1655hrs..
Many times I have met couples who are on their honeymoon holidays, and when you talk to them, you sense their excitement and hopes on the new life that they are going to embark on together. Then there are the old couples who are on their retirement holiday or taking a trip to see their children.
There was this semi retired couple I met on my first flight to London. They were going on one of their many retirement trips, and they were starting their Eurotrip in London then a cruise to Greece and Spain. The wife told me their children will take turns to pay for their holidays, while the husband excitedly took out his phone to show me pictures of their latest grandson. And I think, life is good for them.
On today's flight back from London (for the second time), I was assisting an old lady with her bags, and as I was going to put it in the overhead compartment, she told me that it is heavy and to get some help from the guys. But it wasn't that heavy and I told her I can manage. To which she said,
"You know, sometimes we do need a guy. I have been married for 55 years, and when my husband passed away, I told myself, I don't need a man. I can do everything myself. But as the days go by, you realised that there are all the little things that the men do that makes a difference to your life."
I guess it's the time of the month when my emotions are in overdrive, when she got to the part her husband passed away, I started tearing in my eyes and by the time she finished her piece she saw that my eyes were red, and she too started getting emotional and lamented about " all the trouble and confusion this old lady had to go through at the airport, just to go see my children and grandchildren in Australia. Why can't we all be in the same place together?"
Turns out she hasn't seen them in 3 years and I guess she's both excited and sad that she has to take 2 long flights once in a few years just to see them. I really do feel for this old lady. First the heartbreak of her dead husband, then the loneliness and void in her life that she tries to fill by attempting to see her children who are halfway across the world. And yet she's still so strong and determined.
I see these people, and I wonder if my life could be as good as theirs, or that I will survive if mine turns out to be like this. Will it one day be my turn?
1805hrs..
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| The mountains where Bear Grylls goes gallivanting. |
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| My apartment in Christchurch; living room with a kitchen and a lovely bedroom view of the lake. |
2142hrs..
I've been in Singapore for the past week and commuting on the bus to the choo choo shoe every morning.
Every morning I'll see these few people, without fail.
A mother with her son who I'll always meet at the bus stop. I've seen them since I started taking this bus. They have became my gauge to see if I've missed the bus. They'll stop at Tampines and take another bus somewhere. The mother always wears a weary and unsmiling expression. I took notice of them because I thought the little boy looked like kit when he was young.
An executive who works with the choo choo shoe, who always falls asleep the moment she's on the bus. On Monday we both missed our stop and she had to walk back.
An Indian man (either sri lankan or bangladeshi), who is ALWAYS reading a Tamil magazine full of words. It's either the Tamil reader's digest or some kind of newsletter. He reads regardless, standing or sitting and is always fully engrossed.
A very fair or pale ( depending on how the bus turns and lights changes) looking man who wears a white shirt and a pair of black pants to work. It's a white shirt everyday, and it's a faded white. I don't know how that is possible.
Really do people have to dedicate their lives to labour, day in and out, that they are so tired and have no time for other activities? What on earth are we all working so hard for? Where are we all going?
0347hrs..
It's been one and a half months with the choo choo shoe. I still can't really tell if I like it yet, though being out station is always a new experience.
There's always a lot of adapting to be done on every single flight. The work environment and people are all fluid, things done or seemed this way on one day may be entirely different on another. And I'm slowly learning to just take things as they come and try to be as positive about it as possible. So far so good.
Being in a new country is exciting, I'll always prefer exploring on my own than with strangers. But it also feels very very different from being on a holiday. I guess it boils down to the people I've for company. In Amsterdam, it was much more fun and memorable because I'd a real friend with me. Other times, hanging out with colleagues will just be an extension of work place civility and bleah bleahs.
Though there's been an exception in Joburg, where there were two other colleagues whose company I really enjoyed and felt comfortable with.
Other than that it is nice having time to myself in a new place and really just to see and taste the other parts of the world.
Having said that, I feel that I also appreciate/hate Singapore a little more. The crowd everywhere has never pissed me off so much before until now. Yet it is also nice that the humid air doesn't suck the life out of my skin, hawker food is awesome and it is always nice having the company of friends and the peace of home.